by Ranadhir dasa

I was born on May 6, 1944. In 1966, at the age of twenty-two, I lived in an East Village apartment on East Eighth Street near Tompkins Square Park; about a half dozen blocks from Prabhupada’s 26 Second Avenue temple. I lived on the seventh floor. Just down the hall from my door lived two icons of the Beat Generation: Allen Ginsberg and Peter Orlovsky. They were homosexual partners. I was heavily involved in the drug culture. Although my actual name is Randolph Nieburgs, at the time, I went by the pseudonym Randy Freeman. Hayagriva mentions me in his book, The Hare Krishna Explosion: The Birth of Krishna Consciousness in America (1966-1969).

I went to the temple once, I liked the chanting, but I was put off when Swamiji began talking about the four regulative principles. Later, I must have taken too many drugs or threatened suicide, because my father took me to Bellevue Hospital and checked me in. While there, I happened to meet Keith Ham, who was also incarcerated, although he didn’t have any mental or psychic issues. He preached to me and encouraged me to chant Hare Krishna. After I was released from Bellevue, I resumed visiting Matchless Gifts at 26 Second Avenue. I especially liked the chanting.

I didn’t like following the regulative principles, however, as I mentioned earlier, and continued to use recreational drugs. Once—it must have been Autumn 1967—I invited Kirtanananda and Hayagriva to my apartment and we all took LSD. This was after they had a big blowout with Swamiji and left ISKCON. After a while, they left New York City, and I heard they were starting an ashram out in the backwoods of West Virginia. A non-sectarian ashram without rules (such as the four regulative principles). I wanted to check it out.

In the spring of 1968, my girlfriend/partner Arlene and I went to West Virginia and we stayed a few days with Kirtanananda and Hayagriva. (Later, she became an initiated disciple—Arundhati devi dasi—and got married to Pradyumna dasa.) The New Vrindaban farmhouse was old and rustic. Kirtanananda and Hayagriva did not follow any regulative principles. Their ashram was intentionally created with no rules. I could tell they were still active homosexual lovers. I had brought some LSD. We took LSD together and had kirtan. It was a really good trip. During our visit, Kirtanananda cooked prasadam.

After returning to New York City, I kept thinking about New Vrindaban. I thought it was a cool place; peaceful, back to nature, etc. I wanted to return, and I got a friend to give me and my cat a ride to West Virginia. His name was George Henderson; a gay college professor who knew Kirtanananda and Hayagriva for many years. We called him Dr. George. I brought methadone and recreational drugs with me, as I knew Kirtanananda and Hayagriva liked to get high, and I was quitting heroin.

However, after George dropped me off, I discovered that Kirtanananda and Hayagriva had made up with Prabhupada and returned to ISKCON! They didn’t take drugs anymore. I was stuck there! However, I had brought plenty of drugs, especially methadone, a heroin substitute, so I continued to get high. I attended the morning aroti, I chanted Hare Krishna, ate prasadam, and did some service.

After some time, my methadone was running low, and I started having withdrawal symptoms. I begged and begged Kirtanananda to take me to the hospital, but he refused. He said I should write to Prabhupada. I did, and Prabhupada replied, saying I should just chant Hare Krishna and I would not need the methadone. He was right. Soon I overcame my addiction to drugs. I became steady and followed the regulative principles. I received initiation and the name Ranadhir at New Vrindaban in September 1968.

Prabhupada came to visit New Vrindaban in May 1969. I was terrified of him, and mostly avoided him, preferring to quietly do my service, such as milking the cow and splitting logs. However, I once got up the courage to go to his room and we spoke briefly, but I do not remember much of what he said. I do remember that he referred to my cat as “The Hunter” in his room upstairs in the farmhouse.

I stayed at New Vrindaban a year or two, then moved to Pittsburgh where I helped establish the first ISKCON temple in Pittsburgh. Today I am nearly 80 years old, and I still love Prabhupada, chanting Hare Krishna, taking prasadam and associating with devotees. I live with my wonderful devotee wife of 30 years, Kadamba Devi Dasi, in Visalia, California.

Ranadhir dasa, ACBSP (Randolph Nieburgs)
Visalia, California
(March 16, 2024)